Searching

Text: Rubber coated throatThrows meInto teenage dreamsOf green,Teaming at theSeams. Lean intoThis,Dream of paperbackScented leaves,Escape into the mindOf someone across the world,Live a lifeYou never hadThrough sensations lostCrossedAnd divided. Drink deeply.Lick the salt rim,Stand on the beach you weren’t born on,Walk the roads you’ve never droveAnd call it home.One day it might be.

The Other Body

Hands on the ceilingYou crawl. Legs bent and broken,Up against the wall. Head twisting,Mouth spitting, I wish I couldn’t see youAt all. What are you,But a part of me? A part of meOnly I’m capableTo see. I sing of your existenceCreate artWith resistanceI spread yourBane with assistanceName with insistenceNewly convinced,That I’m a simple mindedFool,Obsessed withAttention.

Heritage

Blank slate. Empty page,Open road,pavement crumbles with eachroll of my tires, each step of my feet. My mother ceased to existwhen I left home, I forgot myself,left somewherein the grocery aisles ofmy childhood. What happens whenI tryto go back? Can I put the road back together again,with melted shoesand beeswax? Can I sniff out the

I’ve Lost You

When reminiscing on the destituteRecall the painAnd acknowledge it by name. Scream it till you’re coarse. Fingertip glanceAt the listOf horrors you once called home. But,Anger is a candle,It’s wicked. Black,Soot lineMascara still in the wrinkles of skinBy your eyes You feel it populate yetSmile with glowing teeth. Have you never watched a candle burn?

Glimmer

Rays of light reach through the windowduring hot, steaming showers. Dust,like glitter,falls. Sunken eyes of woodwatch my every step above. The sink downstairs runs.The children outside laughto the sound of birdsong. These are moments of claritythat I crave so deeply. The opposite of trigger;Glimmer, I’ve been told,is their name. The sensation of calm.

Caught, v4

I used to saythat when the sun shinedin just the right way,that the world lookedlike paint. Paintdrops Candied ribbons,fall upon my flattened tongue. Soak into my veinslike you did once before. The way you colored soundinto the air,the way birds sangthe names of your hues were times of euphoria. When did life become dried,flakey asbestos?

Catch it Once More

Do I smell the sun?Do I smell the ocean?Is there a typical wordTo simply describeWhat brings back theseImagesThoughtsFeelings of peace?I see the sun set that certain wayAs it always seems to do just thatWhen I feel you. Is this important?Am I important?Is this telling me something? It’s hardThis is hardThe hardest best sense of existanceThat

From One False Life to Another

A song plays,it reminds meof a time now gone. The dizzying spellof memoriesblur the lines of what is realor what is false. I believe nothing is fake,there can be accurate truthor inaccurate truth. So then,what is it that I seein my past? How much of my life has been lived accurately? how much of my

When I die,

When I die,I am given the choiceto remember. As my eyes flutter close,My skinmoldssomething it has done before. Which to choose? Male,scruffy,I think I was a sailor. Or,Ferret,flashing lightson either side of me. The hedgehog was there,too. (I believe we angered something.) But now I am him,me.I’m short,Soft eyes,with a growing beard. I will not

The leaves cut

The leaves cut- Eviscerate As I walk below their branches. What is it that I have done? Oh,they say I have forgotten. You seethe world tells me storiesand it has been assigned to meto relay them. Not to anyone but me,I transcribe. They seehow I forgetmy one job; Though I have many others,(and I’m quite